Whose Voice Will Shape Your Child This Term?
By Dickson Tumuramye
A Term Like No Other
As
children return to school this week, excitement and anxiety hang in the air.
For many learners, this is the most critical academic term of the year — one
that will determine their next step in life. From Primary Seven candidates
sitting their PLE, to Senior Four and Six students preparing for UCE and UACE
respectively, this term is more than just another lap; it’s the finish line.
Even for those in transitional classes, end-of-year promotional exams carry
significant pressure and expectation.
This final term is often packed with tight schedules, revision programs, tests,
and emotionally charged preparation. As a result, many children feel
overwhelmed, not only by academics but also by the voices around them.
Who Is Speaking into Your Child’s Life?
In
this emotionally and mentally charged season, an important question must echo
in every parent's heart: Whose voice will shape your child this term?
Will it be the loudest voice, perhaps from peers, social media, TikTok
influencers, or even discouraging teachers? Or will it be the voice of
guidance, truth, and encouragement, ideally from a present and intentional
parent? Children today are exposed to a
flood of voices and opinions; some good, some destructive. While schools offer
structure and instruction, the real anchors of a child’s identity are formed at
home. Your influence as a parent is irreplaceable.
The Emotional Load Children Carry
Our
children are not just preparing for end-of-year exams; they are also navigating
deeper issues: identity, self-worth, peer pressure, academic stress, and
uncertainty about the future. They are silently asking questions like: “Am I
good enough?” “What if I fail?” “Will I disappoint my parents?” Ï am going to make
it?” It is only your voice of unwavering support and emotional comfort that
will echo in such moments of self-doubt.
Your Voice is Their Anchor
While
schools provide academic instruction, parents remain the most powerful
influence in shaping values, attitudes, and resilience, if we choose to speak
up. Your words speak louder in their ears than anyone’s words. A parent’s voice
becomes a compass, helping children interpret what they are going through. That
is how serious it is. Your words speak louder in their ears than anyone else’s.
Whether positive or negative, your voice carries a lot of weight. It echoes in
their minds, comforts them in lonely moments, stronger than any edged sword, and
can either empower or break them.
As
a parent, your voice can be the anchor that holds them steady in this storm of
expectations. Your belief in them can become the fuel they need to rise above
stress and shine in their daily life, exams, and beyond.
Avoiding the Danger of Outsourcing Parenting
As
a parenting coach, I’ve seen too many families “outsource” the responsibility
of shaping their children to teachers, housekeepers, pastors, or even gadgets.
But no one knows your child’s heart better than you do. Teachers are there to
educate, not parent. Pastors can pray, but you are the daily example. And
smartphones will offer information, but rarely wisdom. Your presence matters.
Your words or your silence will shape how your child interprets failure,
success, pressure, and purpose during this term. You are the emotional mirror
in which they see themselves. Make sure they like the reflection.
Speak Life into Their Journey
Let
us intentionally speak into their lives. Remind them of their worth beyond
grades. Guide them in setting goals. Pray with them and for them. Model
discipline, faith, and calm under pressure. Be the voice that says, “You can do
this,” even when they feel like giving up. Affirm their efforts. Notice their
progress. Thank them for how they help at home. Compliment their strengths, not
just their marks.
Remind
them regularly of how much you love them and how proud you are of who they are
becoming, not just what they achieve. These affirming words become internalized
and carry them long after school is over. Whether they are in primary, high
school, or university, children never outgrow the need for a parent’s
encouragement.
Create a Strong Home Atmosphere
Let
your home be a haven of support, not pressure. Create routines that promote
calm, meals together, short check-in conversations in the evening, respect school
visiting days, a prayer before bedtime. Even 10 intentional minutes with your
child daily can make a huge difference.
Don’t just ask about homework. Ask about their day. Ask what challenged them.
Ask how they’re feeling about this term and final exams. This builds emotional
safety and trust, which in turn fuels better academic performance. Remember,
it’s not just school that shapes your child. It’s the atmosphere at home that
determines how well they handle what school or society throws at them.
Watch for Warning Signs
This
term, be vigilant. Some children bottle up stress. Watch for signs of
withdrawal, mood swings, loss of appetite, or unusual silence. These could be
silent cries for help. Be available. Listen more than you lecture. Empathy goes
a long way. Encourage them to rest, eat well, and manage time effectively.
Teach them balance, that while exams are important, they do not define their
entire future.
Conclusion
So,
as your child heads back to school this week, pause and ask yourself again: whose
voice will shape your child this term? Let it be yours, a voice of love,
wisdom, and unwavering belief in who they are and what they can become.
The
writer is the Executive Director of Hope Regeneration Africa, a parenting
coach, marriage counselor, and founder of the Men of Purpose Mentorship
Program.
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