Be Mindful of Wolves among your Associates!

By Dickson Tumuramye

My 4th-year friend (let’s call her Maria) shared with me how she went to visit a friend and met her OB at the same place. This OB was generous enough to invite her to visit him. With all the excitement, Maria approved the invitation, which did not take long to happen. In the middle of their conversation, this good OB demanded sex and tried to rape her. She was only lucky that the girlfriend came at that very time and Maria took off for her life.

When Maria shared with some friends, she was able to discover that it was not the first time he either attempted to rape or raped girls. Unfortunately, the girlfriend was always warned about his boyfriend’s character but she always defended him until that day when her eyes witnessed the incidence.

There are some campus ladies who have fallen prey to such men. Some will pretend to be your friends and extend their request to be a boyfriend. In the shortest time of your relationship, sex will be number one on the agenda. I know there are some people who think sex is always part of the relationship. I think such a mindset is weird and crooked. Genuine love is unconditional. It should have no strings attached on it if it is to thrive.

This also happens among “saved” brothers who start a relationship for marriage but along the way threaten to chuck their girlfriends if they don’t want to sleep with them. The bible tells us that among you there MUST not be even a hint of sexual immorality (fornication), or any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. For be sure of this: that no person practicing sexual vice or impurity in thought or in life or who is covetous has any inheritance of Christ and God (Ephesians 5:3,5).

If you bow to the pressure of sexual demands, it will have a gross effect even in your marriage one day. It may not happen immediately but if you were lucky that you did not get pregnant and abort during your courtship, chances are that there will be unfaithfulness or distrust in that marriage. If you are in a company of boys and girls whose mindset is fixed on sexual advances all the time than true friendship, just know that you will be used as a sexual object and dumped like scrap.

Usually, men including boda boda riders target first-year girls and confuse them a lot because they are still fresh and excited about campus life and vulnerable to any exposure at the campus. They want to explore anything almost put before them. Talk of clubbing, going to any fellowships, churches, associations, freshers’ outings/beach bash among others. They are almost in everything and decision making becomes hard. Before they are in their senses, they have already fallen victims to bad groups and behaviors.

In our current Uganda where kidnaps and evil acts have become the order of the day, avoid going/visiting alone. Where we have witnessed kidnaps and killings of more than one person, inform your friends the person you have gone with, your whereabouts, the company you are in and the time. Keeping updates with friends and family does not take anything from you if you are in the right channels. Take it for granted and allow wolves too in the sheep’s skin to devour you alive.

The writer is a child advocate and parenting coach.

tumudickson@gmail.com