MEMOIRS OF A JOURNEY TO MOTHERHOOD

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By Prim K. Tumuramye


The nine-month journey finally came to an end. What a thrilling journey it had been. I had had my fair share of all kinds of bitter-sweet experiences every woman longs to go through in life. The morning sickness, the mood swings, the cravings and yes, the public sympathies every expectant woman gets.

'So, doctor, how will I tell that I am in real labor?' I would ask the gynaecologist at every antenatal visit.

I had heard countless tales of women that had rushed to hospital during false labor, and I did not want to fall prey to the same plight.

'When real labor comes, you do not need anyone to confirm to you that labor has set in' the doctor reassuringly always answered my question, cheekily smiling at my naivety.

The day I dreaded finally came, and yes, it could not have been anything but labor. We rushed to hospital in a bid not to waste any precious time. What began as mild contractions progressed to intense labor. The pain was unexplainable. Just like the doctor had said, I did not need any one to confirm to me that I was in labor. 

I wished I could cry my heart out because of the pain, my eyes denied me the chance to cry. Had my teary glands also been numbed by the pain? For the first time I had pain that not even tears could soothe. I writhed in pain, prayed repeatedly that this would soon come to an end.

The 8-hour labor experience did not leave me the same. It's then that I clearly understood what a mother goes through. I felt guilty and condemned for the hard episodes I sometimes made my own mother go through as she raised me up. Its then that I appreciated that indeed, nothing equalled a mother's love. Would I be as bearing and patient in raising this child? Did I wish to go through such an experience again. Countless questions run through my mind, not one of them being answered. The clock slowly ticked away like it enjoyed watching me go through this seemingly slow painful process.

Oh, how I wished I could quicken the hand of time!

Morning finally came and I had to still persevere the pain. My only concern was how much longer I had to go through this. Tick ....tack.....tick.....the clock slowly went.

Time check: 7:25am and I got a strong urge to empty my bowls.

'I want to visit the washrooms.' I called out in a groaning tone, tired from the long night's groaning and writhing.

Thank God for the medical team and hubby that never left me at any moment. 

'Just push!' I heard the doctor tell me with a smile of triumph.

 How the rest happened in a blink of an eye, God knows. The next I heard was a baby put on my chest and the mid-wife joyfully announcing that I had a baby boy.  It was an epic moment for me. How the pain disappeared immediately is a mystery that I have failed to unearth till to date.

 I had long decided that my first-born son (if I ever had one) would be called AKAMPA meaning God gave me. Undoubtedly, you are a gift from God. It is you that gave me that first time experience of being a mother. I know I have trekked this motherhood journey more than once since your birth, but your coming into the world marked a tremendous turning point in my life. The mistakes I committed in mothering you, the fears that I had as I nursed you and so many things your coming into this world opened my eyes to have not left me the same.

Amazing how the same clock seemed to tick slowly while I was in labor seems to be running so fast, you are now three years. It’s been a whole three years of thrill for us as a family. The milestones you have achieved, the joys of parenting you give us a reason to live each day that comes.

Looking back at the pain of childbirth, I realize I could go through the same pain seven-fold just to have you. You are a priceless treasure that I could not trade for anything in this world.

I bless the day I brought you forth into the world. Oh, how the month of April brings sweet memories to my mind.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SON!

©Prim K. Tumuramye

16th April 2015

Prim is a Christian, wife, mother and Communications Specialist at Compassion International. She is passionate about reading, writing, youth mentorship and intentional parenting. 

 

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