What parents can do with children during the holiday

By Dickson Tumuramye


The last few months have been awash with media video clips and a lot of things that our school-going children are doing at school that has left the public in shock. The outstanding ones were the bus incident involving students of one of the secondary schools, a student in another school proposing in front of schoolmates, the kids who were found in Entebbe trying to escape for work, and very young kids dancing together, one trying to commit suicide because he was told to shave his hair, to mention but a few.

We also read a story involving 13 students in lesbianism in a girls’ school and many other scandals in most schools. These could be among the very few incidences that we learned from the media, but many more that don’t get to be seen or read in the media are there. I would not want to rush into judging the schools or parents for failing to do their part in raising a generation that is sexually and morally pure.

You cannot sit back and think that since your child’s school is not mentioned anywhere or you have not seen your child do any of such things happening in schools, your child is safe. True, your child could be safe today, but this may not remain the case tomorrow. As the African proverb goes, “you bend a tree when it is still young." This is a holiday that you can’t miss to alert your child of the undesirable and unacceptable manners happening in their schools.

The holidays are right around the corner, as some have already started. There is a need to talk without wavering. Out of the 10 things you tell your child, 2-3 may be implemented and still, you will have achieved something. There are many issues to address if you happened to watch the video clips, watched the news, or read a story somewhere about such vices. There is not any more time to keep quiet and feel like “where do I begin from? How do I start to tell my young child this and that?” There is no better time than now!

Schedule a holiday plan
Ask each holiday-maker to give his/her schedule for this holiday. What will they be doing daily? Their schedule should have activities that involve skills development. You must be ready to supervise what they do daily according to their schedule. Teach them hard work in all aspects of life.

Talk about what inspired them at school.
If you have children who have been in boarding schools, even day scholars, ask each to evaluate how the term was, the good and bad things they experienced, the kind of life that was at school, new things other pupils/students do, new jargons at school, among others. Try to discover certain things happening in their lives which possibly you may never know if you don’t take a keen interest in learning from them.

Domestic chores
Most of the time, we leave our children, including adults, to be parented by Tvs or other electrical gadgets in the house. An adolescent gets out of bed at 10 am, he/she is served breakfast, and sits on any gadget for watching from morning to evening. The nanny, or even you, the parent, is the one serving them. You claim you want them to rest. You don’t even have time to find out what they watch or what kind of music they listen to. They are into pornography or weird songs that arouse them sexually. Involve your children in domestic chores and raise them as responsible adults. Time will come when they will be independent, but you can’t do those things for them anymore, nor can they do them themselves. It will be too late for them to learn certain skills.

Charity begins at home.

No one is a better discipline teacher than you, the parent. Charity begins at home, and it’s a primary responsibility of a parent to teach good morals and values to their children. Use this holiday to instill such in your children; let them unlearn bad habits from school and from peers this holiday. Tell them what is acceptable and unacceptable in your family and in their lives. Don’t think there will be an appropriate time to do so, it’s now.


Me-time with dad/mum
Every child is unique, and they like having their own space with their parents. Take time to provide such a warm moment with each child and share it together. You don’t need to take a child for a special outing as if it is the only way. You can take a walk; you can do domestic chores together as you talk, and you can go on a drive, swim; or play any game together. You can choose any way possible within your means as long as a child feels, this is my “Me time with dad/mum”. Whichever activity you choose, have a fruitful discussion.
Let everyone spare time to address issues that shock us with their children this holiday. Let your children do something tangible other than raising an academically oriented generation.

The writer is a child advocate, parenting coach, marriage counselor, and founder – Men of Purpose mentorship programme.

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Dickson Tumuramye is also a motivational speaker on:
#Positive parenting
#Marriage and family
#Child counseling 
#Career guidance

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