Uganda at 64: When Your Employed Child Still Depends on You
By Dickson Tumuramye
As Uganda celebrated 64 years of
independence on October 9, I found myself thinking about independence beyond
politics. What does it mean to be independent? What does it mean for a young
adult who has a job, earns a salary, and still depends on their parents for
almost everything?
This is a reality in many Ugandan homes. A son or daughter graduates, secures employment, and starts earning. Yet, at the end of the month, the parents are still paying for food, electricity, water, and other necessities.
There is nothing wrong with adult
children living with their parents. With the cost of rent and other expenses,
staying at home can be a wise decision. The concern is when an arrangement that
should benefit both sides becomes a burden on one.
Who pays for what?
Consider a young man earning a
monthly salary while his parents continue meeting all his basic needs. He
spends his money as he wishes, perhaps buying the latest phone or going out
with friends, while his parents struggle to keep the household running. The
question is simple: Is this fair? Do you wait to be asked to support or do you
feel obliged?
An employed adult living at home should contribute according to their means. This does not necessarily mean paying rent at market rates. It could mean buying food, paying the electricity bill, contributing towards water, or taking responsibility for other household expenses. Parents and children should discuss these matters openly.
Nobody
should have to guess what is expected. Remember, the current economy is tough,
and it affects everyone.
Parents also have a future to
prepare for
Some parents find it difficult to
ask their children for financial contributions. They feel that providing for
them is still their responsibility, even when those children are earning. Others
expect their working children to cover every family expense, including the
needs of extended relatives.
Both situations can create
problems. Parents may exhaust their savings, while young adults struggle to
establish themselves financially. Parents should plan for their later years as
much as their circumstances allow. Saving, investing wisely, and maintaining a
source of income where possible can reduce unnecessary dependence on children.
Of course, illness, disability and
other difficult circumstances may make financial support unavoidable. Families
should help one another in such situations. The aim is not to abandon parents
but to avoid placing the entire family burden on one person without discussion.
Your salary is not entirely
disposable income
Young people must also examine
their spending habits. If your parents provide your accommodation, meals, and
other necessities, you have an opportunity to save a significant portion of
your earnings. Use that opportunity wisely.
Set aside money for emergencies,
further training, investments, and future housing. Contribute to your household
and learn to meet your personal needs without repeatedly asking your parents
for money.
It is also important to distinguish
between helping your family and financing every request that comes your way.
Supporting parents and siblings is commendable, but you must plan within your
means. Financial independence is not about refusing to help others. It is about
being able to help without constantly putting yourself into financial
difficulty.
Living together requires an
agreement
Parents should not assume that a
child who earns a salary must move out immediately. Neither should working
children assume that their parents must accommodate them indefinitely without
contribution.
Families need honest conversations
about money, responsibilities, and future plans. A young adult saving towards a
house or business may reasonably need to stay at home for some time. Parents
can support that goal while agreeing on a fair contribution and a realistic
plan. The arrangement should work for everyone, not just one side.
What does independence mean to us?
Uganda's independence reminds us of
the importance of building the capacity to manage our own affairs. The same
principle applies to our finances and family relationships. Parents should work
towards financial stability without expecting their children to become their
only source of security. Working children should use their earnings to build
their future while making a fair contribution to the homes that support them.
We must also recognise that
independence does not mean living alone or cutting family ties. It means taking
responsibility for what we can manage while offering support where it is
genuinely needed.
The real test is not whether an
employed child still lives with their parents. It is whether that arrangement
helps the family grow stronger or leaves one generation carrying the entire
burden.
As we reflect on Uganda's
independence, let us build homes where support is appreciated, contributions
are fair, and both parents and children can look towards the future with
dignity.
The writer is the executive
director of Hope Regeneration Africa, a parenting coach, marriage counsellor,
and founder - Men of Purpose Mentorship program.
Follow more articles on:
Comments
Post a Comment