Positive Parenting

  By Dickson Tumuramye The two years of staying with children at home were not so easy due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Many children had literally dropped out of school, they had forgotten about studies and had now adapted to home life. It was not until the beginning of this year that the government officially opened the economy and all schools were fully opened, and children reported back to school. I remember when we were taking our children back to school, there was a lot of excitement because they were looking forward to that opportunity. But after a few weeks, the moods were different, some started complaining about how teachers are rude to them, they were not caring, the meals were not delicious, not enough, and they were being bullied by other pupils. Along the way, flu and cough became other challenges and we were in and out of hospitals. Therefore, some missed going to school for some days. It has not been an easy term for children to cope with the post-COVID-19 pand...

By Dickson Tumuramye Some Christians have been in lent season, a time of reflection and preparation before the celebrations of Easter Sunday. Easter is a festival in which Christians celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ and the promise of eternal life. It is such a short break that Christians utilize to celebrate such great commemoration. Unlike Christmas break which lasts for more days with a lot of merry-making and family engagements, Easter break lasts for only 3 days and it may end without your notice. However, Easter should be the most celebrated day more than Christmas because it marks the beginning of Christianity, especially after the resurrection of Jesus Christ and it gives a strong foundation for our faith. The bible says that Änd if Christ has not been raised, then all our preaching is useless, and your faith is useless (1Corinthians 15:14). Therefore, we need to help our children understand what Easter is, why we celebrate it and they should not be left hom...

By Dickson Tumuramye Until the recent past, parenting was not as complicated as it is now in the 21 st  century. Before all children were looked at as community children and there was collective responsibility in raising children. Families used to live in extended settings compared to today’s unitary/individualized settings. In some families, parents had time to sit with their children around a table or fire and they would share stories, riddles, songs, etc. This did not only help children to learn how to express themselves but also families would have enough time to be together, discuss family issues and parents would pass on any information that seemed crucial to their children. Where I grew up, we used to share a meal on the same tray or from the same basket (for karo). In so doing, parents were able to identify with their children and establish a relationship together. This is no longer the case today. Nowadays, there is no longer collective responsibility in child upbringing...

By Dickson Tumuramye If there is anything hard in a marriage that a couple wished never happened to them in their relationship are death and divorce. By the time you think about marrying this partner, you have convinced yourself that this is the right person. But along the way sometimes things change and inevitable circumstances happen to tear you apart. It is a very painful moment and the most affected in this whole saga are children. The child’s hero in life and source of safety and sense of love are the parents. When marriage is on the verge of break-up, children are always entangled in the unresolved conflicts between Dad and Mummy, and most of the time they are very innocent and this affects them emotionally. Most couples never let their children know why they are divorcing. Others like to victimize the other party to show children that they are innocent but the other person is the one wrong. A few couples sit down with their children to share with them why they have decided to ...

By Dickson Tumuramye With a digitalized world now, most children are happy to catch up with their pals on social media platforms especially WhatsApp, Instagram, Facebook, etc. than face-to-face. As it is becoming hard for us adults to separate ourselves from social media yet we seem busier than the youth, our children with all the gadgets around them may spend much of their time on it. Much time was used to be spent on watching TVs, reading, doing house chores, but now everyone tries to balance between watching, working, family, and catching up on social media. Social media is becoming a very easy and cheaper way of communication and keeping in instant touch with everyone you need. In the long run, our children are developing relationships in different ways. We need to appreciate that because we are all social beings. The Bible also recognizes the value of friends “A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” (Prov. 18:24 NKJV...

By Dickson Tumuramye While growing up, life may not be perfect as we may wish. If it turns pessimistic, you tend to lose heart and almost give up. This affects your self-esteem and confidence. Those who are not ready to face a cow by its horn end up in self-isolation/rejection but this should not be the case. It is even worse with children. This is the reason why instilling self-esteem in them is paramount.   Self-esteem influences our daily lives, affects our relationships, work performance, and mental health. Low self-esteem can instill feelings of despair, shame, humiliation, anger, guilt, and rejection. If your child is struggling with low self-esteem, take time to discover the factors behind it. You can try to improve his/her self-esteem/confidence. Some people still have low self-esteem in their older age because they were affected in their childhood and you could have most likely noticed how it affects every aspect of your life. Raising healthy self-confidence allows you t...

By Dickson Tumuramye ‘You definitely know X!’ My colleague pushed hard in a bid to help me recall a person he expected me to know. On insisting that no matter how hard he tried I simply could not picture the person he was talking about, the description turned to the person’s likes. Quite often than not, I have heard people describe others by what they like or subscribe to. You probably have encountered lines like….so and so who likes African print, singing etc. We live in an age where people like even the ‘unlikable.’ I am always left perturbed for example by the ‘likes’ that outnumber comments on death announcements posted by social media users. Have you ever cared about the things you like? Our tastes and preferences speak volumes about who we are. In a university setting, where probably young adults come to experience the first phase of ‘freedom’ our likes need to be tamed. There is no one better positioned to watch over this than the individual. Likes form patterns of life. Ev...